Wednesday, May 26, 2004
haven’t blogged in a while, have i?
What’s happened…basically spent most of my time preparing for the science fair judging, skipped lessons again. Went to church, tried to fix a friend a surprise template as a present but well. the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak (or rather, the brain is non- IT inclined lately). Going to BUTS with deen, hopefully, and oh, new track shoes finally. how lovely, they’re orange and white. Planning to buy bright orange laces to match. (not in chronological order…make that
not in order
That whole paragraph sounded terribly happy-ish and hyper. Why why why do i manage to sound like that even when I’m totally
not ?
And i am not anywhere near hyper of happy now. I just feel strangely dead, like, totally separate and disinterested in everything.
Like I’m falling, falling, falling, deeper within myself…and no one’s going to catch me cos they can’t even tell I’m falling.
People have an awful lot of faith in my personality. And no one sees beneath the surface, fortunately or otherwise. If they did..if YOU, dear reader who in all probability is one of those i call friend, they..you…would see that something’s not exactly right.
Don’t ask what, i have no idea. all i know is that there’s a strange scepter hanging over me, and i won’t be
me until it goes away
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