Thursday, December 29, 2005
Christmas was brilliant.
I love home
I love everyone who turned up for our party at Crystal's
you know who you areI love Brandon for his stupid toilet roll quote
(Oh damn I still owe you a post)I love Natalie for her pretty picture holding thing
I love Junwen for Watchmen
(It is SO BRILLIANT!) and for the stolen handphone charm.
I love the pal with the cursor pointing at the wrong icon
I love my gal pal
I love Jaesson
To quote Athelete (incidentally a brilliant brit-rock band),
I love everybody here I got nice presents too, this year's seemed especially many. And I'll list them down because they make me happy. Indulge me please. I know its the thought that counts, but these are all such terribly nice thoughts that I just have to share them.
Happy To Be perfume
Lancome makeup thingie
Birkenstocks
Guitar
Scented Candles
Bright Yellow Marimekko pencil case (its yellow and flowery!)
A
Ewe Boat and a
Skiing Sheep Iprints Notebook
Fuzzy Pink bedroom slippers
A Cheongsam (!!!)
Crabtree and Evelyn box of pretty things
WatchmenNeil Gaiman’s Neverwhere and Smoke & Mirrors
Big huggable pillow
Small green pillow
Placebo's Without You I'm Nothing
Barenaked Ladies' Greatest Hits
Funky CD by obscure band called Within Temptation
Im happy. I hope everyone else is too.
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Monday, December 05, 2005
I spent the entire of today cleaning out my room and study to make room for the truckload of stuff I managed to accumulate in the course of one sem at PGP. Its terrifying, really. So far I have about 3 bags worth of miscellaneous stuff, a carton of cds, an even bigger carton of books, and there’s more waiting to be dragged home tomorrow. I don’t understand how the amount of stuff I own managed to triple itself without me doing anything at all.
Anyway, so that means I gotta clear out the existing stuff to make room for the stuff coming back home. My bookshelves are exploding, and my mother refuses to get rid of the 3 shelves worth of trashy romance novels that no one ever reads AND SO while they sit there and take up precious space my poor dears have to suffer in a cardboard carton. Its supremely unfair. Jude Deveraux and Danielle Steel get shelfspace while
(insert superior, literary nose in the air look) Kundera and Saramago don’t.
So to rectify this sad fact I cleared out the shelf next to my bed and chucked most of it and now I have like a mini bookcase in my room within stretching distance from bed. Its so nice seeing all these books lined up in large numbers. Happy sight ?
On another note, I’ve been talking to this ten year old person from Canada on msn. I’m not entirely sure what her name is, and apparently she picked up my name on
Orisinal’s guestbook. Which in itself is somewhat surprising. It’s really strange, though, cos she’s like the most intense 10 year old I’ve ever talked to. She swears more than I do - and her msn nic was something along the lines of
fuck you mark I hate you I love you I cant stop thinking about you. I don’t know if it’s just me, but I sure as hell didn’t say stuff like that when I was ten. At ten, I was more or less typically anti-male. And I’m not even sure that
fuck was the prevalent and preferred cuss word at that point. Today she came online again and her nic was something about wanting to kill herself because she had lost a friend.
It’s just so…wrong. I always thought that at 10 you’re still more or less innocent and happy. I mean, ok, I’m sure she doesn’t actually
want to kill herself, but its unnerving seeing that coming from a little kid. She’s that angsty at 10…imagine what she’d be like when she’s like, my age.
I feel old. The words “generation gap” suddenly flashed across my mind. It just feels so different, somehow, I can’t reconcile myself to this being the accepted norm. If I do have kids ever I’d like them to stay innocent little kids for a while longer. I’d want them to believe in fairytales and ideal, safe worlds for as long as they could. I always thought that was the best thing about being a kid…you believe anything is possible. The disillusionment comes later.
But in any case, I’m scared of kids. Of having kids rather. Too much responsibility. And the world isn’t such a pretty place to grow up in anymore.
xx Still dreaming xx
ps: sorry brandy! I know I owe you that annoying little entry. Coming soon!
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